Something new

I'm starting something completely new at my uni, a neosoul poetry society . i've been thinking about it for a while but i'm doing it for real now . I have so many ideas spinning in my head i can't even concentrate on my real work . i'm already seeing open mics , slam competitions within the uni and with other universities. I'm seeing acoustic gigs with acclaimed poets coming in doing their thing in a jazzy atmosphere. Starting neo -soul artists coming and performing their spoken word. I can't actually wait to start something new

here is anothe janelle song this one is from her real debut album The audition i love this song

Possible reasons why black women are angry

It is a stereotypical conception that black women are just angry. All the time. i'm not here to add to the stereotype but i am here as a black woman to answer reasons why we maybe angry

1. Black men . of course. One of our curses is to love the black man to the point that we take his inexcusable bullshit. Since the black man still feels emasculated by the white man they still put this burden on our shoulders. So we carry most of their pain , confusion and broken dreams. They treat us horribly because we are the only ones that they can do that too and because we love our black men we sit and take it . But anger of course never dies it just boils and boils and now we have cracked and we talk back and we complain about the black man's treatment of us. They look at it as attitude some of it maybe but other times it is discontent with the way we are treated.

2. Society. society doesn't treat us fairly we are at the bottom of the pile always striving to climb out . We can't possibly be intelligent because we are both black and female. Some people would say but its 2008 , exactly so why do i always feel that when i open my mouth people expect everything other than intelligence and truth to come out of my mouth

3.Clothes size. I for one can not get into a pair of primark jeans because they were made for European sized figures. This tends to mean narrow hips and flat booty's. fit into these things better but our more voluptuous figure can't get the damn jeans past our hips an need the assistance of coat hangers sometimes. This means we are sometimes are ashamed of our assets.

4. We are always stereotyped. we can never be women who want careers or women who want to fulfil themselves in life. We are whores , man thiefs , malicious head rolling finger snapping bitches who reek of attitude . i must admit some of us are like this but this is only because they have started believing the hype. But for women like us who are tired of being seen as unreasonable ball bashers ,keep going

My broke ass

My ass is so broke now i couldn't sell it and make change and just to show you how broke i am:

i'm so broke i can't buy a pint of stale milk
i'm so broke homeless people are offering me money
I'm so broke homeless people laugh at my broke ass
i'm so broke security alarms go off BEFORE i enter a store
i'm so broke i have to make my own Vaseline with cooking oil
I'm so broke i can only window shop at primark

Now that you know how broke i am I'm happy cause now people know how miserable it is to be a student. And how the government has anally rapped me into a debt that may take up to 10 years to pay back even though my education benefits this country. i can't stand this i'm going to fill in maintenance loan for next year

I Love Brazil

i do i really do . I've never been there but the day i do sweet ribena flavoured Jesus it will be the happiest day in my life. i have no idea where my obsession for this country and its language came from but oh dear its come to the point where i'm contemplating on telling people that im a 20th Brazilian . ( that means my great great great grandfather was Brazilian or something) . All im saying is that i made myself a promise the other day that that is the first place im going to visit when i start my free spirit travelling. No but seriously damnnnn let me pull up a picture up for you so you can understand


Beautiful

Don't get me wrong i still think my home country is the most beautiful thing in the world but i don't think i can spend my whole life with out doing everything i can do . i need to see what else is out there ( the fact that Brazilian men are hot does help lol ). i feel i need to see more than my parents back yard and the backside of Portsmouth({{{{ i do not want). just to finish this post i will leave you with a song by janelle monae who I've almost become clearly obsessed with but the girl is on a new level of music

Contain the crazy

My friend and i ( you see the grammar is improving lol i still can't believe i'm an English lit student too)were talking about something the other day that would strike fear into a mans heart . We were talking about containing the crazy . this means that when you meet a new person and enter a new relationship it is necessary to contain that crazy side of your personality e.g insecurities , bad or weird habits or suppressing your true feelings or thoughts. I don't know how we got to this conversation but at the end we decided one thing .. that it is when you contain the crazy at the beginning of the relationship that the person you are seeing will not end up in love with the real you . Instead they will be in love with the contained crazy persona you entered the relationship with . maybe this is the reason why relationships end because in the end the crazy is going to come out and that other person will wonder where the person they fell in love with went to.So here's the plan don't go into a relationship containing the crazy. It's okay to have insecurities etc a person should be loved because they are beautifully human which means they have faults. it will save a lot of heartache if you just go in the deep end naked than being weighed down with heavy clothes because in the end you might drown.if they can handle you when you haven't contained the crazy then they should be worth it because whoever is willing to take your crazy shit is a saint trust me. Besides you know that Jesus is just going to tell them how you really are when you get to those gates. nothing is probably worse than an ex in heaven mad at your ass

The Block is Hott

The heat is driving me crazy. I’m mean for goodness sake I’m African this should be like winter to me. I should be walking around with a coat looking at non- Africans like they were born with no common sense. But I guess my skin has now been westernized. The day I go back my motherland, as soon as i touch the ground im going to burn like a steak on a bbq. Anyway since the sun is pissing me off i will give you reasons why it is pissing me off. There is no point moaning about something unless you have justified reason. Okay here we go

Naomi Campbell wannabe's - Did I see you on the cover of Vogue. err no so why do insist to show off you un toned body . I'm a big girl i know i can't show certain parts of my body. I'm not trying to be mean big girls are beautiful and in all means strut your stuff. But Mary, Joseph and sweet minty baby Jesus there are limits. There are reasons why Baby Gap is for BABIES lol how can you be walking around like a baby gap hot mess. I vote NO! . Next

Man chesticles - I have no words. I’m too traumatised

B.O - In the heat people tend to forget that in the heat your body odour multiplies five times. if you need to hold up a Boots store for all its sure deodorant please do so .I will tell the Police it was for public health and safety .I'm sorry please drop the armpit and walk to your nearest shower before I jump on you with some Vatican holy water . Lord have Mercy on my nostrils!

Hot ghetto sluty messes - just because the sun is out does not mean you can strut out looking like you are selling pure Grade A Chlamydia. Have some decency. I have seen some ghetto hot messes these days .The only thing holding their outfit together are two strings and a belt she swears is a skirt.....okay maybe if you were a stripper.

Lol that’s it for today i think i won't be so stressed about the heat tomorrow cause i would have finished my coursework and other bits and bobs that I’m still completely clueless about

Be kind don't rewind

lol i have been playing my new favourite song over and over and over for the past two days so my roomies probably hate me by now . it is a song by Janelle monae called many moons . It's such a different song and it appeals to my neo soul ears . Anyway I've been holed up in my room revising . I'm only in my first year but already i'm feeling seriously stupid for even attempting to finish this year with just 40%. i'm still also thinking what i'm going to do with my future. i'm still an unmotivated person who just feels the need to just get by . I want to be a writer but i can never be bothered to either start or finish a project that i'm doing . So i always have these ideas swimming in my head and they have no where to go so they just build up and up .So i have decided that this summer is the first time i finish at least one book . I'm also going to improve my poetry which at the moment is none existent due to the lack of inspiration or life experience happening in my life at the moment......Anyway let me get back to my books cause even Jesus healing hands could help this head case

p.s i want to formally apologise for my grammer i know its sucks lol but thats the reason why i going to school for fool

Hip swinging 101

It's summer time ladies don't you just love it. well by now you have your short skirt on cause you got your self a wax hallelujah . if you are white you've got your lovely brown on , if your black you've already had your lovely brown on since winter. but one thing that is left to master is the hip swing again . you lost it in winter cause lets be honest its hard to hip swing when your shivering. So okay down to the basics. the best hip swinger i have ever witnessed is my best -friend v. her hip swinging alone could get her through university . it could also pay for her mortgage or a brand new car. it is a lethal weapon bigger than any of osama's guns thank goodness she uses it wisely (to get us free drinks of course) i have tried to master her hip swing but alas i was blessed with the strut of a drunk troll ( cries in shame )Hip swinging generally takes rhythm so if u are lacking in that departed it will take u alot longer to learn. you have to walk to a beat , a soft pounding rhythm . Also you can't walk to fast or the hypnotizing effect won't work, it has to be at an almost slow lazy walk. That is it, there you go if this is mastered correctly you could make a man take out TWO mortgages. but be careful don't over-do the swing or else you will just look like a concubine in heat. Anyway i hope you are all enjoying the sun please don't be too proud to wear sun-screen . Some girl scared the living African in me when i saw her face peeling PEELING you only see that on sci-fi channel folks

i know who killed me

a student .. probably from my presentation group because to be quite honest i think every student hates presentations . They are stupid and make you look stupid at the same time . i'm mad at whoever thought presentations were are brilliant way for students to evolve their skils. Shame on you i hope the devil is hitting you with a hot poker at this very moment. i hate the fact that presentations always involve this

* your usually put into groups of people you don't know and probably will never identify with . This ofcourse is because it is supposed to help you develop your social skills and team work . but someone forgot something... not all of us have social skills but are rather socially impaired ( for instance i always say something awkward in a large group which makes me look like an A grade idiot) .The meeting starts with silence, everyone looks at each other whilst at the same time mysteriously diverting their gaze. its amazing ,something that should maybe be studied on animal planet . One person then clears their throat ready to speak . BAM thats it! their the leader they were probably the leader from the start but did not want to arrogantly put themselves forward even though their massive ego was begging them to do so . We all look at out new found leader like sacraficial meat. The journey of the presentation has begun

* two weeks later................ two people have already shown their non interest in the presentation . there always have to be betweeen one or two people who can't be bothered with the whole thing . You can't blame them you would join their secret organisation if only you needed that vital 40% .by now you have an asserted position in the presentation group . there's me the quite one who does their work and leaves, attends meeting and only adds something when highlighting someones stupidity . you have ofcourse the leader who thinks he has a sickning arrogance over his powress over the group. God save the King . then you got his assistant who actually manages the group sufficiently making sure everyone is submitting work and putting imput . this person is usually smart and you can see him in the future running a business whilst the King of the group cleans his office. then you've got the sheep they help out vocaly evrey now and then they get on with everyone in the group .

* presentation time........okay its time to deliver the presentation you have chosen two people who say they have mastered the technique of stuttering so as to add extra time to the presentation . bingo . They work the presentation like salesmen selling salt to a sail . their likeable bravado shows the glimmer of light of higher education blurring away the pain and conflict it took to get to that stage.


* presentation ends..... We havn't learnt anything except how much we really hate presentations .

5 things that annoy the Tabster

Hello everyone I'm being forced to write this by the way. This is not willing communication , if it was it wouldn't be saturated with irony , sarcasm and the highlighting of stupidity in me and others ,all in the love of a non- fair traded chocolate bar . Oh the humanity . So this is officially my brown nosing blog post but if it fails oh well i guess some people can't recognise pure unanaldaterated talent.it's like when you look at the sun with your bare eyes its too bright so you have to turn away thus missing its god-like beauty ,that's me. Today ladies and gentlemen I'm going to write about the things that annoy therefore ensuing public safety at the same time if you know what i mean . O.k here we go

1. calling me Tabby the cat or tabster. if you have noticed i do not have whiskers , i do not purr therefore this nickname is out of the question . i add again i am not your grandmothers cat neither do i look like this

( NOT ME !....i hope)
tabster is also out of the question it is not cool or hip you just sound like a moron and make me feel like one too

2. people who run up and down escalators. This is the worst tomfoolery i have ever seen ( refer to Ebonics dictionary) Why in sweet minty Jesus rightful name would you run up and down on something that is supposed to help you go up and down . You should have taken the stairs if you wanted to pant heavily and barge me around .You see i took the escalator because of the luxury of not having to use my legs . That is its purpose .I have been knocked over too many imes by people who insist on showing off they cool new Nike's on the escalators next time I'm tripping YOU up and see how it feels

3.Rude employees . These people annoy me because they are being paid to be rude to you and in fact so are you because the stuff that you pay for is going to go back into their paycheck . I'm sorry if you couldn't get a baby sitter and I'm sorry if you husband won't go to the job center and insists on spending money on fags and ladbrokes.However you do not need to be rude to me i greeted you with a smile , you greeted me with a snarl , a hiss and a FUCK YOU imprinted on your forehead.All in which makes me want to ask ... does someone need a hug?

4. Shorthand. A new annoyance which to be honest is partly because of my sloth like tendencies and the fact that i have the concentration of a crack addict in a job interview.I pray to God everyday that he will set me free from shorthand but every Monday my alarm clock still rings , I'm not sure what he wants from me.......maybe a kidney after all i only need one

5.Individualistic dressing . i know everyone has the right to be different , we don't have to follow the crowd. BUT WOW why on earth did you choose that regurgitated rainbow of a mess. Did the electricity go out at your house or did you just break all the mirrors. Also why do you insist on torturing law abiding citizens such as myself with your eye blinding ensemble. you know specsavers only give me one free pair of glasses every year right? next time i see anyone dressed like a medicated circus clown i am going to dose them with holy water and exorcise the demon that is responsible for making them dress the way they are . For their sake..... and ours

Sunny Days

I'm enjoying the weather . Whenever i see the sun i imagine being outside in Zimbabwe in the searing heat running through the sprinklers in our back yard. These are the days i miss and still love . i miss the smell of back the earth had a special smell to it so poignant you could taste it as you smelt it .I miss the place i was born , it is were i will always belong where my thoughts, skin and beliefs will be accepted. So here it is an ode to Zimbabwe. I love You

I like other things too you know

First of all can i just ask .. does everybody else hate it when your parents ask you a question during an argument and when you answer back they yell , " don't talk back to me ".......but dude you ask me a question I'm mean i have been going to school for the past fifteen years learning to answer questions . have i wasted fifteen years?. while we are on the subject why can i never be right after all your the one who is always saying , " you think your right all the time well you know no one is right all the time ," wow parents i must say are kinda the biggest hypocrites around . one thing i know is that I'm never having children in my life i can't imagine raising someone like me i would probably loose it and begin to go to Scientology lessons. Anyway i'm getting to focused on something else today's topic is...i like to do other things too you know

As some of my friends know.. the ones that i can trust to laugh at me privately and not publicly, i like to write poetry . I have been doing it since a mastered the concept of angst, hopelessness and irony also known as life.i like doing it , its a way of hiding my deepest darkest dreams and fears without them crushing me from the inside which would ultimately turn me into emotional black hole. so what the topic in this . well the thing is I'm black . hm mm you still don't get it . Well you see its like this, black people never do anything that we are not stereotyped to do. Being Loud , check , doing the most ignorant think you can possibly do like putting spinning rims on you car and not even paying your rent of children's nappies , check . So as you can see life is very hard for black people who have other interest because no only society frown upon those who go against these set stereotypes but also black people who are mad that you are not acting 'black' anymore. for them you have broken the mould and have therefore have betrayed them in a Judas executed style and that is just understating the situation.This means that it is hard to be individualistic in a community that harbours a grudge on anyone trying to be different( as in any other community but this is case is extreme) so you have to conform into the 'black' mould that has been already set . it is depressing because this means that no one can be really reach their potential as they don't want to be outcast in a community they actually love and thrive in .Evidence of this can be found in densely populated black community where if a boy who has a passion for piano's instead of shanks will probably seen as a 'gaylord'. since i lived in hertfordshire since i arrived in England black people have questioned my accent because its not a typical urban London accent. .even white people are a bit surprised they expect me to talk like dis blood. Therefore my accent makes black people suspicious as it is not of the communial stereotype and i have a feeling it because they think I'm better than them which i don't of course.So what does this have to do with me and my poetry well, to be honest I'm frightened that my black community won't accept me for being the neo -soul hippy poetic sista that i am. just the same as they won't accept a black guy who just hangs out with white people because he is a traitor to the black people. i think this should stop because as long as black people conform to this stereotype we wont be finally free because at the moment we are still chained mentally since we won't break the mould. We won't explore the potential we could truly find in our self because were are to scared what the next black ignoramus is going to say.Although I'm saying all of this I'm scared of breaking the mould too but I'm going to try and solve that......to be continued

You went out wearing what?

Well I’m back but I don't know for how long you see I get distracted by other things oh so easily which is a bad thing cause it means my mind is fiddly lol which I have realised makes no sense whatsoever. So why the title? . I’m declaring a war, war on all men who find the need to wear skinny jeans. It is not a war on them personally but more like on their stupidity. You see men are stupid in fact the whole human race is stupid and no matter what new gadget or does it itself machine we invent we will always be dumb dumbs. However every now and then we come up with something that makes Neanderthals seem like rocket scientists. This time it is skinny jeans...on men. I could barely understand them on women but men...? I mean did you not want to reproduce anytime soon .I feel uncomfortable whenever I see a man wearing them I feel as if their balls are being squeezed to a perpetual death ever so slowly and are screaming out to me for help. I feel like pulling his jeans down so they can breathe the breath of life and freedom. It is also oh so highly unattractive because i always have the pleasure to see their hairy bum cracks. A reason why I gave up eating breakfast before going to my lectures, it wasn’t the bother trying to keep breakfast down whilst I looked at cousin ITs bum crack .This style is called the tight sag. I preferred it when the baggy sag was in you all looked like ignorant mother watch your mouth but at least you didn't look like pretentious idiots which makes the world uncomfortable. Also what do their girlfriends think about their boyfriends wearing their jeans, it must piss them off. I know if I spent my hard earned money at H&M or Topshop to buy those jeans I had been drooling at for month just for my boyfriend who recycles jeans every month to wear them out I would just die. I know it sounds drastic but I would and I would take that jean violator with me to that magical place in the sky. Apparently these tight sagging idiots are called hipsters and worship some band called the cool kids * rolls eyes* why oh why must I cry. Honestly it’s just a bunch of pretentious middle class kids who have taken the emo look a bit far and are in the course of annihilating the whole race with their ball crushing style. I apologise to any man who wears skinny jeans but I can no longer see you as a man but as a confused 17 year old emo whose jeans have shrunk in the wash.

options

One of the reasons why i haven't written in a while is because I'm lazy i warned you all so don't be all what what in the butt lol . Also i have about the misery that is defamation which officially depressed me and made me question why i haven't moved to America where Freedom of speech is just a smile away. So basically it crushed me because half of the thing okay everything that i right is legally illegal lol so what to write now that i no longer have the bliss og ignorance . i think I'm going to go into the direction of feature story since i have also recently accumulated this sill as well ( i have decided to try and at least attend some lectures) . Anyway this is my first feature bare with me it.......might be well a doozy

options .Life is full of Options. Which is why its so depressing . it's like the matrix do you take the red pill or the blue one . Do you get to walk down the road or skip merrily across it? Even stupid options like that affect your life forever its the butterfly effect. that's why options that you are aware will change your life are extra excruciating. this is because 10 years down the line you will know it is YOUR fault your sleeping under a bridge because you made the choice , the option. Its sick isn't it really disgusting that life can be like this ,can make you feel so guilty for making one decision . That is how i felt today as i sat in a lecture theatre choosing my options for next year which could either turn my life for the better of for the worst. i'm supposed to tick on a piece of paper weather i want to be a deadbeat in 5 years or a rich egotistical writer.hmmmm options options options , you see what i mean its so hard . i don't want to look back and think what if a had ticked the left side . would i be in St tropez sipping on cocktails with unpronounceable Spanish names , Versache on speed dial and everyone calling me Mrs Rockefeller for short (Anything can happen kids) . Anyway you see what i mean in life decisions are so hard because of the consequences .you can call me a consequensialist because i do believe that an action should be taken depending on the consequences. these big Decisions are what cuts the oxygen of life , suffocating any true freedom you may have had and finally killing the unpredictability of it. its sad isn't it . Now I'm off to ponder about the options i might cry, might argue with myself but eventually i will have to tick won of those boxes . Jesus help me

Be Free and Live long

If you have been living under a Hobbit hole (say hi to Frodo) , Kosovo , the country which to be honestly honest only 2 % of the population has claimed its independence about a few days ago but not everyone is willing for them to go free. Oh no Serbia does not want to let go and Russia has viewed the declaration as , "null and void". China has also jumped into the opportunity as usual even though they are way over there in Asia. Someone needs to build a visible fence for them so they can see the visible division between EUROPE and ASIA. Even all the countries in Africa have their independence so for goodness sake throw them a bone I mean they even celebrated with fireworks…. Fireworks people, Sweet honey Wesus save them. I'm sad at this futile need to destroy a newly born democracy. I'm rooting for you Kosovo

What does she mean?

Language to me is very interesting as it is one of the things people can manipulate to express themselves. If you have noticed I use a lot of colloquial terms or if you shall slang, to express myself. Some would say, “Why would she do this she is a potential journalist she should write oxford approved language.” to those who say this mind your own business this is MY blog lol therefore I will express myself and my own opinion in my style of writing. Straight forward writing gets monotonous it’s too square for my liking so I like to spice it up like a good finger licking chilli corn carne. Anyway I hope it shows the diverse way people speak. So to help those who may not know what in sweet chocolaty truffle Jesus I’m talking about I will try and put up a bite on this Ebonics dictionary. Oh and I got a brilliant idea on today: my Weekend Fancy. Yes my Weekend Fancy and no it has nothing to do with being passed out drunk in front of a kebab shop. It is going to be news highlight from the weekend made by an ordinary member of the public written by me. It is a developing idea so bare with me. I will probably start with my friends I can’t be jumping out of bushes yet, trying to convince a pensioner to read the line , “ making it rain on them hoes,” I’m not too good in situations such as heart attacks

Now for the News

An in depth analysis on shorthand

Sometimes I wonder if everything in life is necessary, well everything that man has made .For example a back scratcher why? .For all you people out there I will impart some knowledge that may win me a noble peace prize. We have hands which if are asserted correctly on the back and moved up and down can miraculously turn into a back scrather. Another one of these man made things that I do not understand is shorthand. I find it quite useless in a society where you can record things on your mobile, camera or if you like on an actual recorder which comes in multiple colours including bubble gum pink. I have lost hours of sleep pondering upon the enigma (or mystery for all you people who missed English lessons shame on you) that is shorthand. There are many reasons why I don't like it. One of the reasons is that it does not readily accommodate my laziness because I have to practise EVERYDAY!!!(I know the tragedy). This unfortunately makes my soul grow weary and my knees go weak. I have always been a lazy student, teachers in the past have had high blood pressure over my unwillingness to hand work in time or with the enthusiasm it most justly deserves (dear God save my soul I didn’t mean to do that to them).Anyway I’m sure I’m not the only one who has been endlessly pained by the headache known as shorthand. I know my peers walk in ,like me ,in the two hour session with rainbows shooting out of their ears , invisible daises chained around their necks and beautiful humming birds circling the heads but walk out of it in the end like their student overdraft has been unmercifully snatched away from them along with their Subway vouchers( I have down played the horror so not to traumatise you as we have) . Then when you are in the lesson you feel extremely uncomfortable as if you are sitting naked in the class but no one can see you naked but yourself which makes you feel even more extremely uncomfortable (what a catch 22). I’m sure my teacher is a nice person in real life (shorthand is another parallel universe far far away) but I still don't understand what would make a person spread the bubonic plague a.k.a shorthand to poor innocent defenceless students. Today she asked us what nicknames we would give shorthand teachers. She suggested Dragon ladies and in my mind I suggested people who suck and devour the life and soul out of any happy day with only just word: ready. Then I thought it was too long (I occupied most of my lesson with this). It must be a word that slips off the tongue so readily that it would be like liquid gold when uttered because it would be so richly thought of before spoken. I finally arrived at one word: Dementors. The creatures in those Harry Potter novels that you secretly love but are to ashamed to tell anyone because you are a 40 year old middle class man (I don't judge). They too like shorthand teachers suck the life and joy out of you until you are an empty shell full of bad memories from your childhood you spent 15 hard long years push out of your head. No shorthand for me is not a comfortable experience however I do enjoy it when people say, “You learn shorthand, I thought it was a dead language like Latin." To which I reply, “It is," and walk away with my audience looking so dazed and confused that it’s comical

Saying sorry is the hardest thing

The Australian government has apologised for past grievances it caused the Aboriginal community especially the stolen generations. The stolen generations were Aboriginal children of mixed - descent who the government took away from their families. The policy was introduced as the government thought that these children were mistreated and abandon in the aboriginal communities. This misconception led to a lot of heartache as children who were generally happy in their community were stolen from the community and therefore grew up without knowing their families and culture. This has had a great impact on the Aboriginals as many of them probably grew up not knowing who their parents are. This is sad just plain sad and it is good that the government has apologised even though it wasn't the present governments fault. It shows that the world is starting to recognise its past mistakes and is at least trying to heal them.

Looking good for Jesus

looking good is not easy especially for us women who every time we open a magazine we are told we are hideous creatures who need to buy a few expensive items to make ourselves less hideous and then we do ( next month its the same story) Lol anyway that is not the point . Someone decided the ultimate way to make women buy their merchandise would to make it Jesus approved. I mean if Jesus approved of something I would buy because if Jesus is on the front of the product and it says it will make you look like Hallie Berry DAMN IT I’m buying it even if means having to sell my liver. A Topshop in Singapore (huh they have it there too?) has been put on blast for selling products such as "Virtuous vanilla" lip balm and a "Get Tight with Christ" hand and body cream all which have adoring women at his feet. the range which is called looking good for Jesus has withdrawn the products from its shelves because of complaints from the catholic church in Singapore ( Catholics are always party poopers aren’t they? never invite one to a party damn joy killers )As a Christian ( yes i am even though i do use Gods and Jesus’ name in vain) I’m not offended by this why because the Jesus on the product is white and that is not my Jesus , my Jesus is White , Yellow, Brown , Green , and even bright red ,He is a brightly multi coloured Jesus Christ Superstar thank you very much

Spielberg i commend you

Spielberg gets a Medal of Humanitarian, the second highest medal you can get here (Medal of Honour being the first). Anyway Spielberg has stepped down his role as an artistic adviser to the 2008 Olympics in Beijing as it conflicts with his consciousness. As many people don't know China is one of the worst countries when it comes to Human rights .One of them being Tibet which is still being oppressed by the Chinese government. However Spielberg’s reason to leave was because of the situation in Sudan. Sudan holds a large oil reserve which two thirds are sold to China in exchange of weapons. Why is this a problem? The Sudanese government have been using these weapons to commit horrendous crimes especially in Darfur. Already 200,000 people have dies in five years and 2 million have been misplaced. I will tell you oil will make people do crazy things. The day it runs out I think there is going to be major depression around the world and we are going to see some Prozac addicts .Anyway well done Spielberg I know all country's have problems but China's tends to get away with a lot of things because they are on of the worlds biggest manufacturer of goods and no one wants to piss them of just in case they wont get they favourite made in China merchandise (which by the way is probably made with very cheap labour)

Go home E.T

I live at Portsmouth right now so it freaks me out that they might be E.T flying out there. Either that or Photoshop have got the graphics thing down pretty good. Apparently a man from Portsmouth snapped a picture of a U.F.O whilst driving somewhere. It was foggy and in the middle of the night so what he was doing driving anyway they should have beamed him home or something. Anyway I put the picture up so you can add you 2 cent's the truth is out there....in your common sense
p.s the picture is thanks to the Sun

Sharing is Caring Jesus said so

Have you downloaded any music illegally lately? Well its time to burst your bubble but soon you could be locked up with a murderer with a foot fetish called Jimmy for your favourite hobby .Thought you weren’t hurting anybody? Wrong, you’re hurting the multi-millionaires in the music industry who couldn't buy another Bentley to finish their extensive collection just because you decided to download that Justin Timberlake song instead of buying it. I’m not saying how I download my music I’m not going to let them use this in a court of evidence against me I’m too opinionated for jail thank you very much. Anyway they are going to force internet providers to give details of their clients so they catch those who have been having happy times with their lime wire. BT ,Viscalli and Virgin are already in talks in volunteering to do this now. All I can say is SNITCHES!, tattle tellers lol my mother told me not to tattle on people and that's exactly what they doing , I hope they have a good excuse for Jesus when they are queuing up for the pearly gates because I’m not excusing this.

It's okay the NHS will have hearing aids for them

Lol this is kinda funny, quite frankly I’m offended at the fact that people would use this tactic, really is it necessary it makes me feel like a bad dog that has been caught doing a dump on my neighbour's lawn. ( I know a very graphic visual).Apparently councils across England have been using these Mosquito devices to chase away ASBO potential youths . The high pitch frequency can only be heard by those who are 20 and below and are placed in places that youths may congregate e.g. your local Mc Donald’s, KFC , Post Office(why here though?) and also random street corners. Apparently some people are not too happy about these mosquito devices probably because their kids might be the one's causing the anti-social behaviour hmmm. They are saying it’s against Human rights for these devices to be put up. In my opinion I think they should be put up because the kids these days stand around in large numbers to intimidate those that they think are weak even the elderly. Fair enough people do have the right to stand where they want to be okay but not when it leads anti-social behaviour .Well that’s my 2 cents on the subject you can take it or go to another website

Why does life have to be so uncomfortable?

1st of all I want to say I called my sister today and asked her if I could come and see her on Saturday and her response WHY? .Does the fact that we are blood related not count. Anyway today I had an interesting day. 1st my trousers split on me today in the middle. Jesus himself blushed for me. I thought why why me and went to my lecture with those split trousers. *dies just thinking of the memory* anyway I have been gone for a long time, no worries nothing interesting happened just the same old apple pie. hmmmmmmm. I need help with my retail addiction I really need help. Is there no rehab for people like us? Throw Amy out and let me in damn it. ooooooo children I got 90% in my shorthand halleluiah praise God ... now I need to pay him back by taking my back to church AMEN! Okay I guess you want some real news now.

making it rain on those hoes

Where does this money come from. Is he really a gangsta and is selling crack on the side cause the proportion of this money is RIDONCULOUS. George Bush has set the 2009 budget at $3.1 trillion .Pimping aint easy people.Most of this money is going to Iraq and some of it is going to the national growth of the country which is in a slump .good luck to the next president this is like inheriting second hand syphillis

Gangsta MP

Oh Lord i couldn't stop laughing at this. Apparently Greg Mulholland a Liberal-democrat mp sore at health Minister Ivan Lewis and called him an ,"arsehole" in parliament . ROFL. is that gangsta or what lol tommorow they will say that he listens to DMX , Jay-Z lol and a whole load of gangsta rap.

the whole of Africa is up in arms

Lol i didn't know this. The country Chad which was named after the white guy who sits at the back of your maths class is in the middle of a Civil war . Hell do they report on this , or are they like , " No we don't need to report on that its just african tomfoolery unless they release any death numbers just ignore it now where is that britney story i was asking about," i'm dead at this.Anyway the rebels who think they would do a better job which i doubt cause as soon as they get into power another rebel group will emerge, another vicious cycle people.anyway i didn't really understand the argument but apparently the French are sending troops in to support the Presdent which is illegal.Africans should just stop killing each other off they already have to worry about AIDS trying too . Why can't we just hold hands and skip through the jungle lol .I'm dead to this story too expired like the milk in your fridge.

B.O.B

For all you true Outkast fans you know what that means. To those disgraceful people who don't it means Bombs over Bagdhad. Well i don't like posting Iraq stuff cause the whole situation is sad. it is a disgrace to the whole of human civillastion. It shows we are no better than animals anymore . that means George Bush is no better than a dog trying to piss over someone elses territory.I'm just saying. 64 people have died in bombing done by a female suicide bomber and nother unidentified bomber. the blsts were 20 minutes apart. The dead had to put in wheelbarrows. can no one stop this. i mean these sucide bombers don't they realise they are just killing the same brothers and sisters they cliam they are trying to save the hypocry.How can you make people to scared to walk outside their house , to go to school. i have nothing more to say.

Take the money and Run...run!!

You see if i was offered £22.5 billion yea you heard me right ( thats enough to pay off my debt how many times? and still fly to the Carribean to find me man dem)Anyway microsft has offered the amount of money above to yahoo cause they aint hustling to well anymore. lol .To put it in terms you might understand.This is because google has been hustling the net like a pimp with 300 hoes . So i think they should sell what eles can you do. Anyway its our fault they are in trouble when was the last time you used the yahoo search bar. i know some of you are like yahoo has a search bar?(input stupid face). yes brothers and sisters they do so broaden your horizen and knock the google hustle

" What good are these thighs now that he is gone" Sula , Toni Morrison

Now this is gonna be some deepshit so hold on :

As a girl growing up you always wait for that moment when you realise you are woman. When you are not just an object or something to be put on a pedastal and worshipped for keeping your mouth shut and looking beautiful . A woman, when a man fears every time you open your mouth because its not only wisdom coming out but also strength. A woman when you can have children and be strong role model , love ,cherish them and teach them your ansecstors ways . A woman when you can comfort a man and yet not nurture him like a child but as an equal.A woman who dosn't need to man to validate her and can thrive without a mans love .I'm not there yet, i still have childish tendencies. I'm not going to boast about how woman i am and you are not ( lol this is why i'm hot). i'm what you call a fake woman. i will talk like a woman and walk like one but inside its a different story .so how does this all piece together . well i was having an interesting conversation today with two other sisters . We were talking about men ,generally black men. We were also conversing about self impowerment both which really tie in together. You see for years the black man has never appreciated the black woman's commitment , he sees her merrily as thighs, thighs that work and thighs that plesure. We have never stood for anything more. As soon as her voice rises she is branded to have an " attitude". now i don't entirely blame the black man he has been emmasculated by western society and has been told he is no good. So what does he do to make himself feel more of a man ,he goes and tells the black woman that she's no good. Its a vicious circle that goes round and round.but i have realised that black women are begining to rise up slowly but surely . we no longer see ourselves having to stick to convention set by society both black and white. Its hard being a woman let alone a black women , we are not taken seriosly and we are not respected . we are seen as vindictive and triffling sex objects. We lost our voice many years ago but are now gaining it back. i hope i don't come around as a man hater i'm not . i love my brotheres there are good one's out there but there are also terrible ones ( hands up Eddie Murphy)just as black women have issues as well ,especially with each other. We dispise each other . we talk bad about each other, calling each other hoes( without evidence lol i have evidence for all those hoes from my last blog though ) we steal each others men for no good reason and we talk bad about each others afro- kinky hair calling it nappy and stuff . is this getting too heavy for you well take a breather.

one of the reasons why we are like this is that we hate ourselves for some reason . western society has told us that our lips are too big , our hair is too wholly our bums too big ( i pack that junk in my trunk can i get a halleliugh) or we are to thick in places we are supposed to be bone thin. So we grew to hate ourselves and because we saw the "deformatives" in our sister we bagan to hate each other as well and our union was corrupted. you might say oh this is another black girl confused about her race blah blah blah . but thats the point i am another black girl just trying to grow into a woman but its hard so hard when no one takes your impowmerment seriously.when no one will listen to your reason, when you are just walking talking thighs , it is hard. When i look at my mother i see how hard it is because even though she is strong intelligent woman sometimes people still talk to her as if she is a girl or as if her words come out as ignorant. Its hard isn't Sista's It's hard but all i have to say is it isn't attitude its IMPOWERMENT!

the devil made me do it

Now I'm sorry I've been gone for a while its because I've been doing nothing and you know how much effort that takes. Anyway someone dose this child with some good Vatican Holy Water lol i might just dose myself cause this story freaked me out. A girl from Cambridge claims that voices told her to kill her parents the voices said , "Do it," awww that's crazy she must have been high on PCP oh some crazy AMY. Those who know me know i have recently developed a phobia of being possessed lol i know its crazy.but its because of Ms Michelle's she told me that Emily Rose story and it got me so petrified i can't sleep at night sometimes . Anyway this girl of 16 has been hearing voices since year eight like since she was 13. She has been having some crazy hallucinations as well. Hose her down with some holy water Omg i don't think I'm going to be able TO SLEEP TONIGHT.luckily she didn't succeed killing her parents but I'm still expired over this story

this aint even news

It's not but i know damn well it will make my fellow sisters laugh . they can all realte to this now TRESSIFY!

i forgot today

Its true i think I'm suffering from exhaustion because i have completely forgotten today lol i just remember i few thinks like my exams and swearing at my friends for waking me up lol . So exams what were they like? okay i guess not as bad as i thought they would be to be honest . Lol but i realised something today in my exam
1) half of the exam was full of students who looked 25 over . I'm doing an old persons subject not a good look
2) English students are some lazy people . i saw some dude wearing a shirt and sweat pants . i died when i saw him . I could imagine him high on PCP when he got dressed in the morning . I'm sorry but half of the people looked homeless i was scared someone was going to ask me for change any minute
3) out of maybe 100-120 students there are only two people of colour including me doing the course . lol i knew people were scared of reading but DAMN lol . i think it's because neither Africans or Asians see studying any Art subject as respectful. it isn't a profession like being a lawyer or a doctor. if i came from some Asian or African familys i would have been twice removed for even thinking about studying English literature. thank God my parents have already given up on me and thought never mind.lol the funny thing is that when i tell some black people that im studying English literature and Journalism they look at me as if im learning rocket science they expect me to be doing pharmacology or whatever sciences. All i have to say is that we need to broaden our horizon. i know we can't live on words alone but we can grow from them

Two for 1

Peter Hain an M.P has resigned to show he is innocent after a probe in some donations he received . the law states that you have announce any donations you receive or else it is deemed illegal . Well ... sorry but that's just suspect . I would have sat my self down in that house of commons if i was innocent smiling at everyone like i won the lottery. Actually wait lol i'm having a flashback of one of my reporting of central government lecture. i think they do have resign if something goes suspect
in another European country, Italy ( which is really beautiful if you ever want to visit) the prime Minister has had to resigned after he lost a vote of confidence in the Senate. Ex- prime Minister , Romano Prodi all i have to say is that you must have been doing some jacked up job i mean even Saddam Hussein didn't even get a voted out ( probably because they were all scared of him really)i feel sorry for the old dude how do you get over that

Slap the taste out of his mouth

Don't worry I'm not promoting violence or maybe i am hmmm I'm still uncertain . anyway WIPE ME DOWN! if this was my child ,Lord he would not be alive to talk this foolishness lol . if you have been hiding in the dark like Osama let me enlighten you . Some hormonal Australian teenager decided to throw a part with over 500 people in his parents home costing over $20,000 in damage......................................................... I know i was dead at it too . the worst bit though is that he is proud of probably destroying his home . lol . Now he wants to discontinue his dream of being a carpenter and be a party promoter/DJ.this guy is risking the chance of ending up being a middle aged homeless man to something that might end after year in which he will probably spend the money on pills and supermaning the ...s. but who knows maybe i might end up running his bath water calling him sir get- that- money- Escabor .Again i urge educators to teach some good old common sense in schools. he even has an agent and wants to be like Paris Hilton lol (i don't think he was thinking sensibly when he chose that idol) . Anyway well other people think this guy is a hero of generation Z ( Why didn't we skip to A and miss this retarted generation). Some however think he is a spotty arrogant brat who needs to be left in a ghetto to fend for himself and see how it is to have nothing at all ( the last part is me really). So these angry people have launched a website where you can slap the taste out of his mouth . i had a few goes and i will admit it was quite funny lol i slapped him 126 metres down the street. this boy, Corey ,i forgot to name him that's how irrelevant he is in fact i won't finish this it is just foolishness

mama Africa cries....

I've been meaning to do this but because of the obvious lack of time i haven't been able to . if you have been watching the news you would have seen the situation in Kenya . you will have seen that the situation is really sad. hundreds of people have died over the corruption in the country. Why do Africans have to be stubborn as hell.An African man would give away his belongs ,wife and children and be left homeless before he admits being wrong( and probably his kidney too if he could). in my opinion both Kibaki and Odinga are as bad as each other because they should have held talks along time ago for their peoples sake after all they are supposed to represent all the people in Kenya . but i guess that's not the reality . Everyone is surprised about the ethnicity tension in the country but the reality is that the situation is like that in other African nations the most extreme case being that of Rwanda.This is because colonisation formed unnatural borders and forced people who probably waged warfare with each other for hundreds of years to be neighbours. its like putting Israel by Germany after the second world war that would not have gone down to well . To be honest most African presidents are corrupted but i guess so are the other presidents in the world *cough*BUSH *Cough* except African Presidents always get caught lol usually because they brag that they have more video honeyz than 50 cent lol . Anyway the situation in this country is a real tragedy , it is however a good thing that they now at least talking about it but who knows how long that is going to last . All we can do is wait and listen to mama Africa cry for her lost children

R.I.P

The actor Heath Ledger has been reported dead . Apparently he died on Tuesday at a downtown Manhattan residence, and police said drugs may have been a factor. He was 28.Apparently they maid found him when she opened up his door for the masseuse. and found him dead at 3:26

This is a shame he had talent and seemed to be going places . i hope he rests in Peace

Amy smugglers extra GCSE credit

This story has been around since last year. Two 16 year old girls were caught smuggling in some Amy ( a.ka. crack) from Ghana to the U.K. in July 2007 . The two girls , who have been jail for 7 months, have received a year in jail but since they have already served 7 months they will be released in April. The girls say they were set up..... Please wipe yourselves down and tell the truth. You know very well what you were going for. If you go somewhere with out telling your parents you know for tomfoolery’s sake what you are up to. If an African ' businessman' and I used that term loosely asked you to go for a paid vacation and all you have to do is bring back a suitcase you know for common sense sake why you must be going .maybe they should start teaching common sense in school now because there are some dangerous people running around acting like they don't have any. I’m dead at this. Apparently a third of Amy that comes through Europe comes from Ghana. I know they have learnt their lesson though because I’m African and I know that an African punishment will scar you for life...trust me

Two video's in one day ya'll some lucky people

okay i found this trawling again. This is classic . i know everyone falls asleep in church but not when everyone can see you i wish someone had Supermaned that ... lol there could be some logical reasons why he was slepping
1) he is an old man
2) he was clubbing the night before and only got home at 4 a.m and only went to church to pray for forginess for the activities the night before
3) he is hungry as hell so he is sleping to numb the pain
take you pick this is foolishness though

Another trawling selection .. The Crack edition

Okay if you take offence to people smoking crack please look away. This is mature content and is only for those aged 18 and over. You have been told so please don't sue me and if anyone has a problem with the content just email me and I will remove the content. By the way my friend is practising law so that means in 4 years she would whoop your ass in a court. Just a warning. Any way now all I have to say is WESUS . I honestly don't want to post too much celerity gossip but this is too much .To everyone who buys or has bought an Amy Whinehouse album this is where your hard earned money goes. Mad ain't you. Why couldn't she spend it on Rims or plastic surgery like normal celebrities? I’m dead at this I just wanted to post it because I want people to know the effects of crack. She don't even look human anymore she looks more like gollum’s ( smeagol) love child . Absolutely dead at this.

when things fall apart ....your journalism tutour will be there to save the day

So you know what my laziness has finally bitten me in the ass. Hmmm either that or have seriously offended someone and the Karma has come back with a vengeance like a bad case of herpes (yes that bad). To be honest it wasn't my fault things just somehow went wrong. I got up on time got dressed and walked happily to print off my essay and then hand it in. I had loads of time because I had done this before. I was so happy because the sun was out and it wasn't as cold as it usually was. So what happened? what went wrong ?

So I went into the common room the computers in there are Stone Age old they make Fred Flintstone ashamed. Anyway I opened my essay on the word document but I had done my essay on V's Windows Vista so the crappy old computers software didn’t support the coding on the essay (to think I got an F GCSE IT) anyway I’m starting to panic cause it is half past and my life is slowly passing in front of my eyes. Anyone who knows me knows I’m quick to panic. So anyway I call V to send it to me via email but meanwhile I turn on a different computer. Hey Presto the word document works on the other computer. But what is this oh no for some reason only half of my essay was saved. So now I’m seriously panicking because I don't think I can write 750 words in 15 minutes. So I call V again and ask her if there was a recovered word document of my essay which there is. Hallelujah things are looking up. But then her computer is acting super slow and by the time she sends it, its 12:00 .Now it’s too late to hand the essay okay I’m depressed but not yet suicidal. So I try and print of the document. But guess what NO PAPER in the printer NO PAPER at this point I'm hysterical. I go to the ladies in reception I ask for paper but apparently they can't give me any because they are to busy sitting on heap loads of it. By now I’m ready to burst into tears I call my friend Char to ask if her printer has paper, it doesn’t. Okay that is it. I'm having a heart attack, seizure, stroke, anxiety attack, cardiac arrest all the above. Then who comes swooping in to rescue me (superman that … lol) one of my tutors (who probably asked me what was wrong because I was swearing loudly) anyway she gets me paper and I get to print of my work even though it’s late. This means I can't get anything over 40% which I pray I do get but the thing is that it is 80 % of my assessment for that unit. I’m so mad at this world and myself at this moment. the only person I’m not mad at is my tutor who I’m rewarding a BITE ON THIS NEWS medal of honour, she is a true saviour, Jesus himself could not have come down and calmed me down but she did . I'm getting teary eyed just thinking about it. Anyway now i have to study for an exam i have no clue about and on top of that I’m dead tired. Isn’t life so refreshing (my mum just called me and told me to be more organised ROFL she knows me too well ) I hope you all learn from my mistake.

Dear Al Qaeda

ROFL you know what I couldn’t resist myself when I saw this it made me seriously think what I was doing with my life if the Al Qaeda are now taking in questions from the public. On the Sky News website it says:
“An offer by AL Qaeda for the public to put questions to the terror organisation's deputy leader Ayman al Zawahiri has received hundreds of responses.

Al Qaeda's media arm, al Sahab, announced in December that al Zawahiri would take questions posted on Islamic militant websites and would respond "as soon as possible".
More than 900 questions, mainly from sympathisers, were submitted before the January 16 deadline.”

What I want to know is why wasn’t I there when this come out. Really I would have asked them the best question ever. If they were an American citizen who would they have vote for in the American elections. I know they are supporting for someone. I bet Bin Laden at this very moment ,is in his little cave mansion making slogans and posters for ----- -------- ( i ain’t even going to say a candidate I’m not willing to test the extent of my free speech yet) singing , “ We are the Champions “ . One person asked;
“"Why hasn't al Qaeda attacked the US again, why isn't it attacking the Israelis and when will it be more active in Egypt, Saudi Arabia and Syria?"

I have a feeling that this person at this very moment is getting a knock on their door and is being shipped away to Guantanamo Bay in nothing but his or her sponge bob square pants underwear. Don’t you just love democracy :) ( if you don’t know where that is that is where they keep suspected terrorist illegally)
. Anyway so far no answers have appeared and the questions have disappeared from the site. ROFL. Maybe they were satisfied with the questions or decided that they had better things to do like do their job which is installing fear in the world.

How do you like your Ebola in the morning

They are trying to kill us I am legend style. I was trawling through the news sites when I saw this article about them making the Ebola virus "safe". In all honestly I don't trust scientists because they are too strict about everything and they don't leave space for possibility, fairy tales , miracles and things that makes this world magical (there it is that idealism again). To be honest I don't understand this .I really don't what will we gain for messing with this .The article didn't even show the marvellous opportunities that would be gained from messing with this death wish . On the BBC news website it said,

"Ebola, currently handled in highly secure labs, kills up to 80% of those it infects."

80 % that's crazy people absolutely bananas. Merciful Lord I'm not ready to die if this thing mutates and we all die or become degenerated zombies. These old scientists need to sit themselves with some buttered popcorn and watch I AM LEGEND. They will learn the errors of their ways and go to church the next day to pray for forgiveness for playing God (which would be amazing as most of them are probably atheists ) that movie scared the overdraft out me. It just showed how man's destruction will be caused by his own curiosity and advancement. All I'm saying is that men need to sometimes take a step back and check what kind of mess they are in. look at Global warming. I have no comment on this issue anymore I'm dead at this issue

late night essay writing

I should have written this essay years ago , its due tomorrow and i have about 100 words to go . Why God why I'm i cursed with sloth..... why? because there is so much creativity in my mind .lol i feel like this is going to be an extension of the soo lazy post but here we go. I'm lazy lol i want to write in the uni newspaper but can i be bothered ...nope I'm hoping this blog thing will motivate me in life cause i have such a chilled outlook of life . hmmm anyway im up doing this essay which is remarkably 80 % of the unit (shiver my timbers )lol i can't wait for my exams to be over. i feel like i haven't learnt anything from uni seriously in fact my head is emptier than when it arrived. i don't know what my course wants from me . At least in A level i knew exactly what was needed but here is zilch nothing. the units are unfulfilling and have the excitement of having your hair shaved off in the middle of the Sahara desert .oh yea i won't be posting that much news because of my exam I'm sorry I'm going to starve you of my oh so important comments but wipe me down i have to at least get 40 % in my exams

So lazy

I should be studying right now but instead i'm watching Jungle Fever with my friends. i have a feeling im going to be here for summer re-sits. hmmm anyway whats good. i did say i was going to post conversations that i have with my friends .Define your beauty was one. Which was cool you know then the other one was syphilis. Lol how we came to this conversation i don't know but my best friend v ( who if you meet is one of the most perfect person but she's not too right in the head) . Anyway V has become scared and obseesed about syphilis and no one can have a conversation with her without her mentioning it lol She has become celibate(yea to the right) and is crusading against syphilis . its hilarious she has even turned me off men actually all of us and the word syphilis has actually become a catch phrase between us (how sad)She has also grown a hatred for men which is quite understandable ( evil spawn of the devil) Hmmm watch out she will be handing out pamphlets outside our union ROFL. On the serious side though STI's are a serious thing so if you know you have multiple partners ( i don't judge your business it is your business) and you don't use protection go and get tested just to make sure your healthy after all no one can take care of your own body like you . Also there's no harm asking your partner to get tested as well .but i'm not lecturing just advising the old bearded man in front of the class you wander in every now and then does that

Metal Detecters to be fit into secondry schools

In all seriousness the growing culture in knifes growing in the U.K within the teenage society is growing rapidly. A lot of people would blame it on Hip Hop music but come on there is so much you can blame on that. What about neglect, poverty, ignorance. There are so many factors that make a child pick up a knife and carry it around. This is what needs to be dealt with. Fair enough putting metals will catch kids bringing in knifes and weapons into school and then what they won’t be violence in schools but it will probably spill out in the streets. Most of this violence happens in London areas where the majority of people are Afro-Caribbean. This is because most of these children have the perception that they will not be able to move out of the conditions they live in so to get the respect they need they convert to violence. As sad as this sounds it is true. We need to understand to give these kids hope. Maybe I’m being idealistic. But the black male still feels emasculated from the times of slavery but the way he tries to prove himself to gain respect will soon prove to be his downfall.

LOL another trawling selection

i found this whilst trawling the net i find this so funny lol . It would be funny if neither Barack or Clinton win . i'm rooting for the under dog anyway enjoy.

If you have seen this man

The Police have revealed a picture of a suspect for the Madeline case .The Police have revealed a picture of a suspect for the Madeline case. The guy does look suspect I mean if I saw him walking in the street I would probably cross the road. The case of this girl is really sad. I know there are speculations about who did it and what not. But the parents really, what motives would they have. Also I know everyone says they are bad parents but I don’t necessarily think so I think they made a bad judgement. My mother has lost me so many times when I was a child I memorised my name and address because I was sick and tired of having to look for her. In fact the other day I was walking down the road when I saw this woman run inside her house. She left her car door wide open with her two children in there. Any sicko could have walked by and just taken them. What I’m trying to say is that those parents are human too and they made a bad judgement it’s a shame that people are so quickly to judge others. Hm hm hm. Anyway if you see this suspect looking man please do call the police

Haters be hating on my mini-fridge

So the other day our halls of residence had a room inspection. Fair enough. i had a mini-fridge that i didn't know i wasnt supposed to have (hmmmmmm) . So what happens the next day i get a letter full of bloody terms and conditions that i'm supposed to sign and the halls manager has to approve of. Do you want to know some of the ridiculous things in the terms and conditions.
1 they can knock down my door GI Joe style anytime they want to to check my tiny mini-fridge that can only hold a pint of milk
2 they have to have proof that its new(like a student would buy anything new) and a copy of its gaurantee
3 If my mini-fridge causes any damage i have to pay for it come on my straightner would cause more damage that my minii-fridge

I pay shit loads to live in my lunch box ( yes my room is that tiny one person in at a time please) that i can't even have a mini-fridge. I mean i'm not making bombs, i'm not hiding Al Qeada and i'm not running a CRACK DEN its just a mini- fridge . I'm dead at this dead . anyway now for some real news oh yea and check my friends post lol im inspiring loads of people to start posts. You will enjoy this one its not about news but .... go to www.ramblingsofasbf.blogspot.com

Film Review: Alien versus Predator blah blah blah

hey people what can i say hmmmmmm except did you know time goes slower when you are seriosly bored. you can keep that piece of knowledge it is a gift from my genius.I don't know what to say honestly its the same stuff i watched last year .Really . There were a few parts where i screamed like a 5 year old being chased by a crack addict but thats it. Otherwise it gets a 2 out of 50. The two is for actually having the nerve of making the movie. that takes balls. I wish i had spent my money on two happy meals now... i quit this.AMEN!

What goes up must come down......

A Boeing 777 performed an emergency crash when it apparently lost all power and avionics when it was about to land. The incident happened just before 1 pm on the 18th. Survivors spoke of sparks coming from the undercarriage of the plane. The Flight was coming from Beijing and the passengers had to evacuate the plane emergently when it landed. Some major flight from Heathrow have now been delayed until further notice . Wow could you imagine that ,i know i would have acted a fool on that plane if i was in it. Dear Lord would have had to slap me himself to get me to calm down. Some passenger had this to say about it

""I have flown a lot and it was probably the roughest landing I have ever had."(the Telegraph)

What the roughest landing? did he have a look at the plane when he got of it it looked like the side of it had been chewed up by Godzilla.......

I'm not saying his crazy but.....

I don't want this to become one of those celebrity blogs but I will occasionally post something celebrity wise that I can't help but question. I was trawling the web when I found a clip of Tom Cruise on the Internet doing his scientologist thang. Wesus! ( I'm trying to stop saying Jesus’ name in vain bare with me more ideas will come) is he not tangier than a Jehovah’s witness on your door step at 10 am on a Saturday . I mean honestly I know some people seriously view it as a real religion but I personally don’t. I mean its not the aliens or the no pills thing or the placenta eating at child birth that freaks me out. Its the way the way these people believe in it, it is almost like clowns on crack lol . What happened to the good times when people believed in God, Allah or Buddha huh I miss those days oh well I’ve got the clip for you so enjoy this pure debacle of a human being called Tom Cruise
p.s Dear scientologists please do not start a hate file on me it’s not worth because:
1) Its sad come on I'm an 18 year old student
2) 100 people beat you to it already its has probably lost its originality by now

Tom Cruise - Scientologie
Uploaded by larsen42

Bush... a true American dreamer

LOL i found this as i was trawling the sky news website:


"George Bush says the writers of history will praise America for "victory" in Iraq.

Bush addresses the troops
Addressing US forces in Kuwait, the US President said: "It's hard work that you're doing, but it's necessary work.
"There is no doubt in my mind that we will succeed. There is no doubt in my mind that when history is written, the final page will say, 'Victory was achieved by the United States of America for the good of the world'." "

ROFL can someone please tell Mr Bush to sit down and quietly play President . I swear i have heard this same speech before hmmm maybe two , three or maybe four years ago . But i guess he has to leave singing the same old song. Good for him for not changing his record or as others would put it , still being in denial. To be honest as an ex-history student i have a feeling historians are gonna brutaly massacre Mr Bush in the history texts books and his weapons of mass destruction ( which by the way seemed to have been magical because they simply disappeared). And does Mr Bush have his own definition of the word "victory" because when i looked it up in the dictionary it came up as:

"a success or triumph over an enemy in battle or war"

All i'm saying is that some people need to take out their oxford dictionaries and read them very S-L-O-W-L-Y. Or perhaps the troops in Iraq are still there because they like sunbathing in the nice scorching desert. After all nothing says victory like a killer suntan..does it Mr President

Human Cows

Its really sad to think that slavery isn't over even though it has been "abolished" for centuries. I was browsing through the news sites to find news to bring to you when i found an article about children from Nigeria being transported to countries such as Italy and the Netherlands. The organised crime was carried out by Nigerian women who would adopt Nigerian children and then sell them as either sex slaves or drug couriers.I still find it hard to understannd how other human beings can do this to each other . I also find it hard how the EU can continue to let this trade to grow so high every year . The sitituation is worsening even here in the U.K where women and children are being stripped naked of every single human right they have.

Rain with more chances of rain

The weather man owes me two umbrella's, yes two . I have to blame someone after all its so embarrassing walking along in the street struggling to keep your umbrella in you hand whilst its turned inside out . Lord have Mercy. I've had enough of this rain , is Noah building an ark or something. If he is can we not be flooded after its done .Anyway there are flood warnings all across England. Forecasters are predicting 40 mm of rainfall .80 Flood warnings people 80 ,the heaven are not messing around with this rain and i guess its true what they say about when it pours it pours. To be honest i don't know how much that is but it does sound quite alot.lol.Areas such as South West and Wales are expected to be the worst hit and this includes Coulchester and Tewkesbury who seem to keep get no break from the floods. God must be mad if he is trying to drown us off the face of the planet or maybe it is for polluting it . After all what goes around comes around so think about that next time you throw something on the ground a tornado might just take you away like Dorothy.

So Let Me Introduce Myself.......

I chose to study journalism because i wanted the unheard voices to be heard through me .But i don't know anymore . University does that to you i guess. It twists your ideals until you come out wondering why you ever believed in what ever nostalgic nonsense you believed in . Its like when you see something in a shop window and want it so badly and then when you get it you find out you look like an absolute twat ( and your friends notice it too) , it has suddenly lost the precious glamour the window gave it . Well thats my course . I don't feel motivated at all by it , i just feel like im going to ride it out like a bad case of cold sores.

Anyway so whats the point of this blog except my journey through my course ( and shorthand can anyone else read their own shorthand its Impossible!!! its just illegible gibberish ).Well i wanted to write about current news with much added comentry but a more bitesize verion for all you students on the go . Its so hard just getting straight news without the intellectual jargon about the the new disastor , hurricane , Bush screw up ,so i thought i would bitesize it for all you students and make it oh so interesting . So please do visit whenever your awake at 4 a.m in the morning for no damn good reason . Oh and please don't sue me i'm new at this , i missed a couple of lectures on theories and techniques and my overdraft wouldn't be able to take the stress.Do not take things personally i'm only going to post things if i have evidence . ....... So now let me introduce myself