You went out wearing what?

Well I’m back but I don't know for how long you see I get distracted by other things oh so easily which is a bad thing cause it means my mind is fiddly lol which I have realised makes no sense whatsoever. So why the title? . I’m declaring a war, war on all men who find the need to wear skinny jeans. It is not a war on them personally but more like on their stupidity. You see men are stupid in fact the whole human race is stupid and no matter what new gadget or does it itself machine we invent we will always be dumb dumbs. However every now and then we come up with something that makes Neanderthals seem like rocket scientists. This time it is skinny jeans...on men. I could barely understand them on women but men...? I mean did you not want to reproduce anytime soon .I feel uncomfortable whenever I see a man wearing them I feel as if their balls are being squeezed to a perpetual death ever so slowly and are screaming out to me for help. I feel like pulling his jeans down so they can breathe the breath of life and freedom. It is also oh so highly unattractive because i always have the pleasure to see their hairy bum cracks. A reason why I gave up eating breakfast before going to my lectures, it wasn’t the bother trying to keep breakfast down whilst I looked at cousin ITs bum crack .This style is called the tight sag. I preferred it when the baggy sag was in you all looked like ignorant mother watch your mouth but at least you didn't look like pretentious idiots which makes the world uncomfortable. Also what do their girlfriends think about their boyfriends wearing their jeans, it must piss them off. I know if I spent my hard earned money at H&M or Topshop to buy those jeans I had been drooling at for month just for my boyfriend who recycles jeans every month to wear them out I would just die. I know it sounds drastic but I would and I would take that jean violator with me to that magical place in the sky. Apparently these tight sagging idiots are called hipsters and worship some band called the cool kids * rolls eyes* why oh why must I cry. Honestly it’s just a bunch of pretentious middle class kids who have taken the emo look a bit far and are in the course of annihilating the whole race with their ball crushing style. I apologise to any man who wears skinny jeans but I can no longer see you as a man but as a confused 17 year old emo whose jeans have shrunk in the wash.